I don’t tell every story in my journal.  I might go days without writing or fill out 10 pages in one sitting.  It’s so important to bring out the natural stories of our lives.  Most of them are good.  But you know what?  Some of our stories aren’t good.  They’re miserable.

The writing prompts in Gadanke journals are all about getting deep into our souls and really documenting who we are.

Yesterday, my story wasn’t one of the happy ones to write.  But as I wrote about all my frustrations, I started to feel this incredible wisdom come to the surface.  I started to see beauty in the imperfections of my current world.

So I thought I’d share.  I thought I’d show this sense of discovery.  My frustrating entry became a journal entry about finding warmth from the inside.

Writing the bad stuff is a good thing.

(I am using a Gadanke {She: Me * Myself * My Days} journal.)

My journaling reads:

Jan 20, 2011

It’s a cold day outside. I don’t think it’s going to get above freezing.

It’s a cold day inside, too.

I hate this feeling of constant cold. The heater wasn’t working when I got up this morning. It was 61 degrees inside as I ate my breakfast. The more the wind blows, the colder it gets in this house.

The wind blows A LOT here.

Tonight’s forecast: blizzard with 60 mph winds.

I’m wearing long underwear and a down vest with my sweaters. I’m drinking tea. The heater blows and blows, yet it can’t seem to hit even 67 degrees!

(continued on the next page)

Martin measures the floor: 51 degrees.  He measures the front of the house: 51 degrees.  It’s madness!

This cold makes me resentful.

It makes me resent the the very kind man letting us live here. It makes me resent the sweet, sweet neighbor who so desperately needed us to stay in the United States over the winter.

I don’t want to be resentful. I want to be that person who jumps out of bed, eager for the day again. I want to be filled with love.

“I’m sorry there’s no sun,” our neighbor said over the phone. He knows how cold this house is. I never tell him. But he knows. And he keeps hoping for sunshine – it’s the only thing that truly heats this place up.

And this cold? It’s really made Martin and me a team. We’re working harder than ever to help our neighbor and to reach our own goals. We’re cheering each other on. He never hesitates to hold my hands in his or bring me more tea.

We have plans for a weekend visit to the hot springs.  We have plans for keeping our desks a little warmer.  Together, we have so many plans. This cold? It’s also teaching me gratitude.  It’s teaching me hope.

These are the things inspiring me to think handmade this week.

With all our chatter about handmade, I want to share some heart-related loves that you could certainly make yourselves.  You could easily go with star or square shapes instead of hearts and love-dove stuff.

Here are a few old school Valentines made from magazine cutouts and cardboard scraps.  Would these be a fun any-old-day project for mailing to someone?

This heart mobile was for sale at Pottery Barn Kids years ago.  Doesn’t it look easy to make?  You could even do it with paper and yarn.

You know I’m crazy about these Love Letters from Gadanke.  I’m still writing a little note – one page and photo each month - to Martin each month for a year.  Still waiting for the perfect photo opportunity for January’s page.

I’m also thinking about using one of these minibooks for some other family members this Valentine’s Day.

These Valentine Pins (a tutorial from Purl Bee) have always caught my eye.  It could just be the incredible photography… because I just don’t know who would wear one at our house.  So I file it away for one day.

Martin and I, meanwhile, are addicted to the nature shows on PBS.  That’s something we can get into together.

We watch them over the internet with every quilt in the house piled on top of us… especially during those Winter in Yellowstone sort of shows, which are my favorite.  Brrr!

Wowzers!  I’ve been working like crazy over here with a lovely and loooong to-do list.  Is it weekend yet?  (Then I look at this picture of me journaling in 6th or 7th grade and think… is it summer yet?!)

• I’m packing up to go to Blissdom, a blogging convention in Nashville next week.  Are you going?  PLEASE FIND ME!  Please say hi!  I’m so excited to meet fellow bloggers in the United States – like my conference roommate and pal, Jane from The Borrowed Abode.
• You can flip through the pages of the love letter I’m writing to Martin right here… (sigh).
• Here’s a little business interview a fellow handmade blogger did with me.  So fun, Gussy!
• And guess what… Gadanke just won a green business award. Can you believe it?!  I’m so, so happy and doing my best to lay low and NOT add a million exclamation marks here.  We’re heading to the capitol next month.

Eeeeeeh!

Okay, I’d better get back to these to-dos.  Thanks so much for being here with me.  I promised Martin that I’d try to make an apple, pear, cranberry cobbler from this cookbook.  Doesn’t that sound divine?

I’ve started a collection of original paintings.  And by collection, right now I mean one.  This one:

This little owl that flew over to our house was painted by Michele.  Her Etsy shop is PipiLaLa.  I love the little scarf he’s bundled up in!

I really like the idea of individuality in our homes and supporting “the little guys” like craftsmen and artists.  Have you ever been in a home decorated primarily with handmade goods?

My grandma’s home was filled with original paintings, sculptures, and even handmade covers on her light switches.  Every plate and mug in her house was handmade.  It was unbelievable!  She bought a lot of them, made them herself, or traded with local artists.  Her home felt like magic when I was a kid because of one thing:  her home felt handmade.  Everything was there because it had a story.  It meant something to my grandparents.

All too often, it’s easy to pick up something at the store that doesn’t really matter to us.  We just think it might look good in our home or we can think of a use we’d have for it.  But how often do we flip it over to see where it came from? How often do we pause to wonder about the item’s story?

Mass produced items – do they have a story when they’re made?  Do they have stories in our homes?

I love this owl because he’s out there standing on his own.  There aren’t 30 million others exactly like him.

I love this owl because I imagine the dreams and passion Michele must have had as she painted him or packed him up to mail to me.

Sometimes when I start pining for our apartment back in Berlin, I admit it might be because I’m creeped out by vacuuming tire trim again!  But more than anything, I think it’s because we were creating a handmade home there- tearing down walls together so we could build our own dream kitchen from sheets of wood, sewing banners and quilts (okay… Katie sewing banners!), and hanging a handmade clock.

I think our hearts are so attached to that little corner of the world because it’s all us.  It’s all dreams and passions coming together.

So maybe one day, we’ll find another original painting so my collection can double.  Maybe we’ll have grandkids oohing and awwing at our handmade collection.  And maybe, do you suppose I could finally walk away from the Made in China.

What do you think?  Does handmade make your heart patter?  Is it worth more than something mass produced?  Or is it something you ever ponder… you know, when you’re vacuuming your tire trim?

Guess what’s here and in the shop!  Three adorable blank journals with vintage fabric covers:

Aren’t they so sweet?  We’re really loving (and petting… lots of petting) them at our house.

It’s been so hard to keep these journals a secret.  They involved so much research and connecting over the last month.  My sister gave up a whole sunny winter day to spend with me in my search for all the details over Christmas break.  It was a blast, and I’m so thankful for her!

The pages of this journal are blank.  They’re perfect for list making, diary keeping, or old fashion scrapbooking.  I’ve been taping some business cards and writing little quotes and poems in mine (it’s the Citrus yellow blooms print).  Of course, the pages are all 100% recycled, and I even tracked down American-made ribbon to wrap it all up.  It’s pure love.

I have to show you the first page.  It’s got all the good stuff for listing the details.  It’s also got one of my personal mantras.  I am so busy trying to be the perfect wife, perfect sister, perfect home keeper, perfect German speaker… perfect everything.  I bet you can relate.

So I came up with a little motto for my personal life a few months ago.  I think you might like it in your world, too.  It’s the perfect start to a favorite little blank book:

i find happiness when i quit trying to be perfect

Which vintage fabric do you love the best?

Today is a busy day for Gadanke.  So many ideas have been brewing in my mind.  Now they’re all coming together.  And over the next few weeks, I think they’ll be ready to smile away in their own special corners of the journal shop.

Here’s a sneak peek at one of the lovelies.  It’s made with vintage fabrics and 100% recycled paper.  I think that’s got to be the perfect reduce, reuse, recycle journal ever.  Plus it’s so darn cute that I’m already filling one up with little daydreams.

Hope you have some sweet little weekend dreaming yourselves.