I Forget English
Sometimes I forget English.
It isn’t one of those brilliant moments where I know the German word instead of the English word. Not that easy. I start forgetting words like “jet lag” and “toiletries”. And in case you’re wondering – I have absolutely no idea how to say either of those in German.
I’m just forgetting.
My head is a mixed salad.
Once a week, I get together with a few girls from my German class to practice. I suspect that the other patrons in the cafe just roll their eyes. We butcher German like a dog left alone with a feather pillow. The fact that I can even sit down and speak to people in a second language is unbelievable. When I started writing Making This Home, I could only count to 10 and introduce myself.
Now I’m not sure what I can do in German. I think of German words and doubt myself because I can’t translate to English to double check if I’m right or not. And then when I speak English, well, like I said – I make up phrases and draw ——– blanks.
How old are you, Katie?
Me: (blank stare)
What time is it?
Me: It’s… uhh… thirteen… no… one… 1:15.

My new friends from class are forgetting their native languages, too, when we go out for coffee. Sometimes they throw in an English word or two. I don’t understand that they’re saying “STAR” or “VACATION” in English. All I know is that I understand. Learning a new language completely challenges everything that you never had to even think about before.
That’s me in the middle of saying something very complicated to my classmates about the American health care system, Obama, the Atkins diet, diet pills, organic meat and….
Oh who am I kidding. I was probably saying, “I don’t read verbs in the newspaper.”
Verbs. Advertisements. Yes – I actually made that mistake. It was the mistake I actually caught myself saying when we were visiting last. I meant to tell them, “I don’t read advertisements in the newspaper.”
I’m starting to wonder exactly what I am saying in every language.
We can’t have sophisticated conversations in German.
Writing blog posts is becoming slower and harder.
When I talk to Martin, I ask him to hand me my “hand shoes”. He laughs. Then I realize I am not saying “mittens”. I am directly translating the German term “Handschuhe” into “hand shoes”.
I have been approached by a few advertisers interested in promoting their language programs on Making This Home. Apparently, you can master a new language and speak like the natives every three months with some of these online products. The average person CANNOT DO THAT. I believe my classmates could sum up my response after 600 hours of class:
“Katrin (my name), you sound so American!”
And just for the record, our grammar is far from perfect. They really end up saying false grammar like, “Katrin, you speak always American.”
We’re trying.
Tomorrow I am bringing chocolate chip cookies to class. I have to cut up bars of chocolate to create chocolate chips (no chocolate chips here, as you expats know!), and I can only hope my classmates enjoy the treat.
Because when I offered chocolate chip cookies to Martin’s coworkers? Well let’s just say it’s not what you ever ever expect to have happen to America’s favorite after school snack, and I do not want to be left with that many cookies ever again!
Can any of you relate to my struggles with language? How about communication? Or heck, cookies? I know I am not alone. So please pipe in with your thoughts. (And yes, I had to stop and think. ”Really, Katie? ’Pipe in’? Okay. I think that is all right. Readers will tell me if I’m wrong…”)








March 25th, 2010 at 9:55 am
We speak English every day at home of course, but there are times when I get my English mixed up with German and find that I can’t remember what I’m trying to say in either language. How embarrassing. I often feel that I must look like an idiot. German grammar is terrifying and insane IMO. Kuddos to you for doing so well though. I hope they like the cookies. It always cracks me up when I go to Aldi and see “American Cookies” on a bag of chocolate chip cookies.
March 25th, 2010 at 10:06 am
I have nothing to add, but I am beyond jealous and super duper impressed that you are learning a second language. Keep up the good work!! I am sure you’ll be dreaming in German in no time!
March 25th, 2010 at 10:43 am
You’re cracking me up!!!
I took several years of Spanish in high school and college and at one point, I was speaking so much of it, that I started dreaming and thinking in Spanish…
I’m sad to say that it’s been years, and I can’t speak a lick of it anymore. : (
March 25th, 2010 at 10:45 am
Oh Katie — yes, that’s absolutely right. I’ve taken six years of French. Six! Sometimes I ask Mr. Savvy for things in French, and I realize I’m saying the French word for it, but the English word just isn’t coming to me. For some reason, this happens most often in the car: “Oh, do you mind if we stop at the magasin? I need some more potato starch. STORE! I meant store. Sorry about that.”
March 25th, 2010 at 10:47 am
Sometimes I try to think of how to say something in Chinese, and I can only think of the word in Spanish. Of course Chinese is my ancestral language and Spanish is what I learned in high school… it’s embarrassing! I’ve studied a bit of Spanish, French, and Portuguese, and it gets incredibly confusing when the words for some things are so similar (amor, amour, amor) and the words for other things are so different (first one that comes to mind is hola, salut, oi, though that one’s easy from all the practice we get saying hello!).
One of my brothers-in-law lived in Japan for ten years and since he’s returned, he’s become incredibly quiet. We kind of suspect he just doesn’t remember how to think in English anymore!
March 25th, 2010 at 10:50 am
I took 4 years of German in highschool and (I’m now 30 years old) I can still count to 100, say the Alphabet and a handful of other words. My parents actually think it’s funny and will ask me to say random numbers, just because. I had the opportunity to go to Berlin a few years back and I thought I would be all cool and speak Deutsch; but who was I kidding. I said two words and then was at a loss…the people just stared at me and then switched to English.
What I have noticed though is that I can still “read” German…okay, I’m saying “read” because I can sort through a paragraph and tell you the gist of what it is trying to say; but couldn’t give you much else.
Keep up the hard work, German is a difficult language; but well worth it. Ich Liebe Deutsch!
March 25th, 2010 at 11:04 am
Well I could say ‘are you pregnant’ – because when I’m pregnant I find myself forgetting words all the time! But I have a feeling you’d have told us if you were, so I’m sure that’s not your excuse (just mine!). But I think it’s totally normal what you’re experiencing! I’m so impressed that you are as conversant in German as you are! Languages are hard. Being in a new country is hard. And you’re not only doing it – you’re doing it style and grace and sharing your experiences with us! Thank you for that!
March 25th, 2010 at 11:50 am
I’ll ‘chime in’, lol
yes, totally get you! My English is peppered with German, and my English is sprinkled with Deutsch! “How tall are our schranks?” “Wo dann ist unsere recycling Tonne?” lol
ps – so you’re going w/the cookies, cool. I have to say if there’s ever leftovers from my ‘typical American’ treats, it’s because people think they’re way too sweet. Hope you don’t have that problem w/the cookies!
March 25th, 2010 at 1:02 pm
Thanks for posting this. It really brought me back. I’ve been here ten years, so my days of German classes were a while ago but they are still really vivid in my head. Now I find it hard to be back in the U.S. because I can’t do my usual switching spontaneously into German or German phrases like I do with my American friends here.
Good for you for making chocolate chip cookies. Germans are so big on the baking, I still haven’t figured out how in the world they haven’t figured out the glory of chocolate chips!
March 25th, 2010 at 1:19 pm
I remember being an exchange student in Finland and one of my classes was 3rd year French. Taking the test, I balked at the french words and offered up a finnish/english bad grammar frozen brain moment.
However, one of my fellow exchange friends locked himself in his bedroom over a long weekend and emerged speaking fluent and understandable Finnish.
I’m with you.
I would love to send you Chocolate Chips. Serious. Just send me a line and which brand you remember longingly.
Kathy
March 25th, 2010 at 2:04 pm
pssst, I think you meant “pipe up” :)
I’ve always been impressed by people who know a second language. I’ve had four years of Spanish and could not have a conversation to save my life. I think the culture shock you must go through on a daily basis (well at least at first, hopefully you are feeling more settled now) must just be so hard. I’m glad you enjoy so many things in Germany, especially living a simpler life in a beautiful small apartment. You are an inspiration to me and I have enjoyed learning many of the tips and tricks you have for living with less. Oh and I’m proud to say that I have joined the “no new clothes” and only shop at my local thrift store (well, except for underwear and socks) since the beginning of the year!:)
March 25th, 2010 at 2:33 pm
Katie; Do you have something to tell us? Is there a little bambino on the way? Is that why you keep forgetting words as Kristy suggests?
March 25th, 2010 at 2:36 pm
Dad, I think you know the answer to that!
March 25th, 2010 at 2:38 pm
Tovah: Pipe up? Ohhhh…. right…!
I love all of your mix ups, all. So thank you. Virtual chocolate chip cookies all around!
Katie
March 25th, 2010 at 3:33 pm
Oh I’m so glad to hear I am not the only one who “forgets English” sometimes! :)
Seriously, it happened all the time when we were living in France, and now that we are preparing to move to Germany and are learning German it’s happening all over again.
It’s funny how the little accomplishments become HUGE successes when you are learning a new language- My husband and are are still in the very early stages of learning German (this week we are learning the Months and the weather)— today I got together with some of my girlfriends and felt the need to exclaim in German to everyone (as if it were of utmost importance): “Today the weather is nice- it was cold yesterday!”. I was so proud of myself. We had a good laugh about it. :)
It’s nice to enjoy the little things!
March 25th, 2010 at 11:18 pm
Oh, I totally forget English words. You are not alone! I am currently studying my fourth foreign language. Studied Spanish in high school and college (got to a pretty good level of fluency, but have forgotten a lot of it now), Maori for a year in high school in New Zealand (just for fun), Thai for two years when we lived in Thailand, and I have been learning Chinese for a total of 4 years now. My brain is a mess of words and sentence patterns and exclamations in various tongues.
I find that I often can’t think of a word in Chinese because the Spanish or Thai word pops up instead, and more and more often I am having a hard time coming up with English words. Sometimes it’s because the Chinese word is “in its place,” but often it’s because it’s a word I just haven’t had opportunity to use in awhile because I am not speaking English as much as I would in the US. My sisters think it’s hilarious when we get together and I can’t think of the most basic words or phrases, like “reservation” or “ice cream parlor” or “parking validation” or “corkscrew.” I am always saying things like, “Can you please hand me that thing? The silver one? The one you use to take those other things out of the tops of bottles?”
March 26th, 2010 at 12:46 am
I got this interesting “visual thought-concept” about learning new languages a while back. Language is generally left brain (linear, logical, structured), but LEARNING the language “might” be RIGHT brain (intuitive, creative, flowing). As we learn a language as a child, the left brain is maybe bypassed in that process of learning; it’s at least partially kinesthetic. (Maybe.)
If we are holding a spoon and mixing ingredients in a bowl, the kinesthetic (“body”) ACTION helps to anchor the objects, words, and sentence structures in the physical cells of our bodies if we are talking (mimicking?) sentences while stirring; the cells of our bodies are PARTICIPATING in assimilating the words.
I decided that learning a foreign language would be SO much faster if we “bundled” it with a physical activity. Tapping a pencil; doodling; twirling our hair in our fingers; dancing; driving. I don’t think it matters. But MAYBE, the more cells that are involved… the faster we learn… or maybe we learn more permanently. Maybe using the part of the body that “acts out” the actual concept is most useful.
Maybe it DOESN’T matter how much of the body is used, or how many of its cells are used.
Some people have an “art” for learning languages. Is it a coincidence that “art” is the term often used for that ability? I think not. They must have some “brain translation” ability that is less common or UNDEVELOPED in many others. I think that what is happening is that their BRAIN processes things in SUCH a way that the right and left brains communicate easily with one other; thus, they can “translate” abstract ideas into the physical words…and vice versa. What an exciting concept. I’d love to discover more about that. (Of course, I just made that up… so there might be NOTHING to discover… LOL!)
Did you see the TED video of Jill Bolte Taylor when she talked about having her stroke? [http://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_s_powerful_stroke_of_insight.html] When people used words, she heard “bla, bla, bla” (or maybe it was “woh, woh, woh”). It meant nothing to her because her left brain (that could understand the MEANING of words) had shut down.
When I hear “bla, bla, bla” (a foreign language, technical terms, numbers), I ignore it; my brain has no place to “catalogue” this, so it gets thrown away. Before a language is “learned”, does it get “thrown away” because the cataloguing infrastructure isn’t developed, yet?
Kathryn Kistner in Texas
March 26th, 2010 at 12:54 am
My take on this is that ALL learning accompanied by physical movement creates a CELLULAR MEMORY of the words by somehow binding the words to the action. We are encapsulating them into the cells of our body where they are held until we need them. (This is my “working” concept… don’t know if it’s “true”.)
How do we get them out? Maybe act out the original action? Or maybe it’s not necessary as it becomes a PART of us; a part of our cells. It’s just there when we need it.
As children this is how we learned a language. This is how we learned kid-songs. There was usually a physical movement that helped us to remember… to tie the words to the movement.
When somebody handed us a toy, they talked about the toy by name. The toy goes into my hand (kinesthetic)… mommy says the toy’s name is “ball”… *THAT’S* what a ball feels like… *THAT’S* what a ball looks like; oh, look, a ball bounces; a ball rolls, a ball won’t stay on the table by itself; I have to chase a ball to get it back (whole body action… chasing the ball).
That introduction to a ball involved tactile cellular memory, visual cellular memory, auditory cellular memory, and muscular cellular memory. We likely tasted it, too. And what about that rubbery smell?
Of COURSE we learned it!
What memories are the most vivid for us? Is it a time we were knocked down, hit, hugged? A time we swam, rode a bicycle, fell? A time we made love, vehemently told somebody to get lost, stole a cookie?
Most likely we DON’T have strong memories of JUST sitting at a desk in school.
MANY years ago I was jumping on a mini-trampoline while I watched a movie. A day later, when I began jumping again, the whole movie began unfolding in full detail… in my mind… the movie was playing in my head.
The same thing happened when I sewed on my sewing machine and watched a movie. The movie was RIGHT THERE the next day when I began sewing again. Songs returned in the same way after dancing to them. And telephone conversations returned after doodling.
Oh, wow, I just got another “concept”. Is this why tactile-deprived children appear “stupid”? Is this why old people, who sometimes have minimal outward tactile stimulus and little physical activity more quickly “lose” their memory? OMG!!!
From Kathryn Kistner in Texas, who’s now saying,
“Now go out and hug somebody! Shake their hand! Pat them on the back! Plug them back in!”
March 26th, 2010 at 2:43 am
I am doing the same thing. I finished my German classes about six weeks ago, so my head is slowly moving back toward English (I’m trying to fight it by reading everything I can manage, listening to the radio, etc.). Nonetheless, even when I’m speaking with people from home, I say things like, “I’m not sure what I’ll do jetzt.” “Genau” pops out all the time. Handschuhe and Hausschuhe are much quicker out of my mouth now that … wait, wie sagt man das? … mittens! and slippers. I marvel that “the” is simply “the” and has no gender or dynamische oder statische movement attached to it…
Nonetheless, I’m considering heading back to the US because I’m just not finding work here… and it’s very sad to think I won’t be speaking this language everyday. It’s such a wonderful way to communicate!!
March 26th, 2010 at 11:21 am
Oh Katie, don’t feel bad about language mix ups. My mother came to the States from Denmark almost forty years ago. She is more than fluent in English by now. Nevertheless, when relatives come to visit, she loses her English. She will speak Danish to the relatives and then say something to me that starts in English and ends in Danish even though she never taught me the language. Or she will come out and say something completely in Danish to me and one of the Danes will have to tell her that I’m not answering because she is speaking to me in a language I don’t know. The longer she has to go back and forth in two languages the worse the problem becomes.
I also know someone who has lived in many places and learned several languages. He says “I speak eight languages and am fluent in none of them”. The more languages he learns, the more trouble he has with speaking properly in any of them, even his native language. After a while, all the words seem the right thing to call something and trying to keep straight which vocabulary goes in which language is a muddled mess.
March 26th, 2010 at 3:28 pm
Boy, can I relate. I used to live in Munich a long time ago. I went to German language classes 3 hours a day, 5 days a week and my throat was sore from practicing for the first 3 months. Then it started to make sense, got to the point where I forgot English words too, or worse, mixed them up.
Wait until you start dreaming in German. ;) Should be soon.
March 26th, 2010 at 10:40 pm
I do a lot of reading in English, so when I learn something new I sometimes don´t even know the German words! But on the other hand, I often forget the most simple English words. So my English sounds funny, and my German is mixed with English words, which I absolutely hate. There ars so many absolutely unnecessary English words used in Germany, especially in advertising, but also for other subjects.
Btw: There is no German word for Jet Lag, you have to use the English one!
March 28th, 2010 at 3:03 am
Ha. I come from the other side of the spectrum: I studied German for five years, until I was 18. Now, when I go for trips to Berlin, I can’t remember the simplest words. Keep up the good work! Immersion is the best way to learn.
March 28th, 2010 at 12:39 pm
Hi there,
I stumbled over your blog earlier (when I was googeling for natural food coloring…go figure *lol*). I happen to be a German living in the States and I so love to read the impressions an American has about life in my country. Cause I remember how I felt, when I came to the States…how strange and how wonderful a lot of things seemed to me. I’ve been here now for 6 years and oh, I so know what you are talking about forgetting words. Some of my German family even claims I have an American accent sometimes *lol* Anyways, all the reading made me home sick now….luckily I will get to go this October :o) I am glad that you enjoy living in my home country…I sure miss it sometimes
Greetings from the US
March 28th, 2010 at 12:50 pm
How long are you already in Germany? I was forced to learn fast since otherwise it would be hard to work here. And I started to work 3 months after I came.
English is my third language, italian the forth one…and it is not easy. I work in a science so my laguage skills have to perfect.
And the more you learn the more you see that even Germans can not perfect german, they also make mistakes…
March 28th, 2010 at 1:39 pm
great post! and great comments.
i think stress plays a part in not remembering words no matter how many languages we know.
i tried to teach myself portugese last year and got some vocab,b ut it was tough going without others to talke wtih. and i found myself scrounging up old french words from highschool french.
good luck on your german.
March 28th, 2010 at 2:19 pm
I can relate to the language too, but in kind of a weird way. I studied Romance languages in school (Spanish mostly, and a little German) but I’ve never lived anywhere other than the US. I knew I had become really comfortable with Spanish when I began to have dreams in Spanish, or my classmates and I would have conversations mixing English and Spanish without really realizing it.
One time, my family was visiting Paris. We’d been there maybe a week when my mom, who had studied French for 5 years and was pretty comfortable with the language by the end of the trip, would try to talk to my brother or me. She’d be speaking French without realizing it, and she would be really confused when we’d get blank stares on our faces. (After it happened once or twice, I would just respond in Spanish, which she couldn’t understand, because I was being an obnoxious teenager, haha)
About 5 years ago, though, I fell and injured my head – not terribly, but enough for me to have some scary language problems for a while at first. It was like the access to a lot of my vocabulary had been blocked and I just plain couldn’t remember the word for things. Writing was agonizing and reading was just a little easier. Sometimes, though – and this was weird – I wouldn’t be able to remember the English word, or verb conjugation even, but I COULD say it in Spanish or even Italian, which I’d studied most recently but had the least knowledge of.
I wonder if you’ll be able to work your German and your English separately when you get more comfortable with German and you aren’t emphasizing memorization/translation so much. I hope blogging doesn’t become so hard that you decide to stop writing :)
March 29th, 2010 at 9:43 am
Katie,
Ok you have just scared me half to death! My wife who is born and raised in Germany will be leaving with my 5 year old son and 14 year old daughter on April 20th to move from Dallas to Germany. I am so worried about my kids and how they will adjust. I am so worry they will be all confused and not able to cope. I have heard it is easier on kids to learn, but am still worried, and do feel a little helpless since I will still be here in the States. I will not be coming over myself for good until sometime early next year. I have been trying to learn with German with Rosetta Stone. Which is a very good program, but I am not learning as fast as I like. When I have tried to speak some sentences they all seem to be mixed with have german and half english. I just hope it comes easier for my kids, they are set to start school 2 weeks after they arrive. I am wondering if anyone has any advice for them? The one saving grace is the fact that my wifes mother who will be in the same village as them used to be a school teacher who taught German.
March 29th, 2010 at 9:16 pm
Great post and the comments are quite interesting. I don’t have anything to add, as I only took one year of Spanish in junior high and then went to Mexico City for a week. I hope that blogging doesn’t become too difficult, though, as I love reading yours.
March 31st, 2010 at 1:48 am
One of the most frustrating experiences I’ve had in the last year has been learning to build. I never learned how to build things when I lived in America and spoke English. I’d ask people for advice, and they had plenty of it, but suddenly I was drowning in all this specialty vocabulary that, when I looked some of it up, I didn’t even know in English.
Now I’ve managed to learn what I need to know (tool names, hand work verbs like sanding and painting) and when English speakers ask me to tell them about what I’ve been doing on the wagon I just sit there opening and closing my mouth like a fish because I have no idea how to say any of the things I’ve finally learned in German.
Nothing like living in a foreign language to make you feel like a child, over and over again. Offers a nice perspective though. Keeps me humble for sure.
April 1st, 2010 at 11:42 pm
Oh no! I know the feeling perfectly! I have been taking German classes for 5 years now, and stayed in Germany many times. I believe the phenomenal new language you have learned is one I am very well aquainted with- Denglish. Die Beiden werden ein. Es ist einfach lustig, wie Sprachen man ändern, nein?
April 2nd, 2010 at 1:01 pm
jja – Martin & I returned to Germany in September after living here and remodeling our kitchen in 2008.
Thanks for sharing all of your experiences and confusions with languages.
Don’t worry, though, Eric. It’s not a scary thing. It’s a really, really incredible thing to experience new thoughts and ways of thinking!
Katie
April 3rd, 2010 at 4:09 pm
You put into words what I feel ALL of the time as an American living in Quebec for (or since?) 4 years. I used to pride myself in my command of the English language and in spelling perfectly. Now, I write a phrase, or worse, say something out loud, and realized I’ve completely mixed my metaphors or made up a new expression or even used bad grammar. And my spelling is atrocious. I’m just thankful for those squiggly red underlines that point out my mistakes.
I love this post!
December 26th, 2010 at 3:49 pm
I realize this post is several months old now, but stumbled across it looking for info on living in Germany. First of all, THANK YOU! The information in your blog has been really helpful and exactly the type of (forgetting the english word right NOW.) stuff (we’ll just go w/ that one!) I want to know : )
My husband and I both grew up in Hawai`i using proper English and the local “dialect” and have been living in Japan the last 2 1/2 years. All the Japanese I learned growing up, studying in high school and college is mixed with English and I find myself in the exact same situation as you described! I can’t remember the English word, but have no idea what the Japanese word is either! I’m so glad that someone else goes through that! There are times when my husband just stares at my daughter and I because we’re speaking some kind of Japanese/English mix without realizing that he just does not understand.
We’re getting ready to move to Germany in a few months and have been slowly learning German (I’m talking snail’s pace, 1 word a day slow), so it will be interesting to see what happens when we’re there…German/Japanese/English/Hawaiian mix?
Thank you again for your post and your website…AWESOME resource!!! : )
May 28th, 2011 at 2:46 pm
Just found your blog and I loved your work!
I am brazilian and I speak (a kind of bad) english at home with my husband. German I speak with other people, but you can imagine it is not good at all. I live in a small, small, small village, and people normally speak a kind of dialect, that I cannot understand at all! I think that to learn German will take me forever, and, till I learn it, my english gets worse and worse. =) But my portuguese is still fit! hahaha
Many greetings, nice to found your blog!
January 27th, 2012 at 9:51 am
I found your blog from your flying experiences (since I am interested in getting my PPL). Anway, I am trilingual (English, German, Hebrew) and you’re right soon as you get that ability of learning a new language, you sometimes forget English ones. Now don’t get me wrong, I am not 100% fluent but I do well enough. Anyway, I was talking in English when I forgot a few words here and there and the only words that came to me are German ones (like Armbanduhr because I forgot the word watch), and I tend to mix up languages. Like when I speak Hebrew, every so often German words come out, and when I speak German, Hebrew words come out.