I Forget English

Sometimes I forget English.

It isn’t one of those brilliant moments where I know the German word instead of the English word.  Not that easy.  I start forgetting words like “jet lag” and “toiletries”. And in case you’re wondering – I have absolutely no idea how to say either of those in German.

I’m just forgetting.

My head is a mixed salad.

Once a week, I get together with a few girls from my German class to practice.  I suspect that the other patrons in the cafe just roll their eyes.  We butcher German like a dog left alone with a feather pillow.  The fact that I can even sit down and speak to people in a second language is unbelievable.  When I started writing Making This Home, I could only count to 10 and introduce myself.

Now I’m not sure what I can do in German.  I think of German words and doubt myself because I can’t translate to English to double check if I’m right or not.  And then when I speak English, well, like I said – I make up phrases and draw ——– blanks.

How old are you, Katie?

Me:  (blank stare)

What time is it?

Me: It’s… uhh… thirteen… no… one… 1:15.

My new friends from class are forgetting their native languages, too, when we go out for coffee.  Sometimes they throw in an English word or two.  I don’t understand that they’re saying “STAR” or “VACATION” in English.  All I know is that I understand.  Learning a new language completely challenges everything that you never had to even think about before.

That’s me in the middle of saying something very complicated to my classmates about the American health care system, Obama, the Atkins diet, diet pills, organic meat and….

Oh who am I kidding.  I was probably saying, “I don’t read verbs in the newspaper.”

Verbs.  Advertisements.  Yes – I actually made that mistake.  It was the mistake I actually caught myself saying when we were visiting last.  I meant to tell them, “I don’t read advertisements in the newspaper.”

I’m starting to wonder exactly what I am saying in every language.

We can’t have sophisticated conversations in German.

Writing blog posts is becoming slower and harder.

When I talk to Martin, I ask him to hand me my “hand shoes”.  He laughs.  Then I realize I am not saying “mittens”.  I am directly translating the German term “Handschuhe” into “hand shoes”.

I have been approached by a few advertisers interested in promoting their language programs on Making This Home.  Apparently, you can master a new language and speak like the natives every three months with some of these online products.  The average person CANNOT DO THAT.  I believe my classmates could sum up my response after 600 hours of class:

“Katrin (my name), you sound so American!”

And just for the record, our grammar is far from perfect.  They really end up saying false grammar like, “Katrin, you speak always American.”

We’re trying.

Tomorrow I am bringing chocolate chip cookies to class.  I have to cut up bars of chocolate to create chocolate chips (no chocolate chips here, as you expats know!), and I can only hope my classmates enjoy the treat.

Because when I offered chocolate chip cookies to Martin’s coworkers?  Well let’s just say it’s not what you ever ever expect to have happen to America’s favorite after school snack, and I do not want to be left with that many cookies ever again!

Can any of you relate to my struggles with language?  How about communication?  Or heck, cookies?  I know I am not alone.  So please pipe in with your thoughts.  (And yes, I had to stop and think.  ”Really, Katie?  ’Pipe in’?  Okay.  I think that is all right.  Readers will tell me if I’m wrong…”)